the women in my family

living in close quarters with them makes me realize and appreciate the emotional strength and courage and intuitive wisdom the women in my family all share.

it makes me see, too, though, how in some other ways, i can never be like them in terms of the games that they play on each other and their men, ways which have and always make me feel different and left out, and which i used to think was a "weakness" on my part, that i was never woman enough...

one has a tendency to manipulate others with "i told you sos" and snide remarks on how things could have been done better; the other is direct and upfront and speaks her mind but still has this devious trick of cutting you down with one remark, usually beginning with pointing out some generally unnoticed part of your appearance, and then putting you down with a comment about it in one swipe.

another has a tendency to be a pleaser, always asking you for your agreement on something, and then a huffy-puffy sense of wounded pride, always perceiving any comment you make as referring to her, especially a slight on her.

another is generally easy-going, except that when she sees you dressed well and looking good, she makes up for it by putting on too much makeup, if she cannot match how you dress...

but they are the ones with their men, while i still have to be with my own, for keeps.

does it take being devious and manipulative to have a man in your life? sometimes, i wonder.

hmmm.... maybe it does, depends on the quality of the man who will put up with it, i guess.

maybe they're just lucky.

or maybe i'm the lucky one. who knows? : )